ALL PROBLEMS ARE OPPORTUNITIES IN DISGUISE
‘Take risks, be vulnerable’ are words I have heard from many directors since training to graduating to working in the professional world of acting.
Let me tell you I decided to take the biggest one to date, one so scary and unknown to me, the words weren’t printed in a script, the ending wasn’t written in a play, nor improvised in a rehearsal… this was life, my life and the toughest decision I made was leaving my 11 year relationship.
Why? You may ask… We were stuck;
I was working a million and one jobs to survive in London while trying to juggle work, money and the acting world I so wanted to succeed in while he was struggling being in London, pressures of being a graduate and me not being there a lot of the time. I was sharing a house with someone who was crying out for my attention when I was doing exactly the same. Falling in to the trap of not spending quality time together and being stuck in patterns neither of us could see a way out of.
Why? Lack of communication.
According to health professionals, lack of communication is the No 1 reason why relationships fail and leads to 67% of all divorces
From this I cried a million tears, the upset to cause a significant loss of weight, unhealthy behaviour, but as my great Grandma Hannah said to my Mam, who has then said it to me:
‘Have a good cry, dry thee eyes and get on with it’
And so I did, life continued and I unexpectedly found myself in a London bar on a Wednesday afternoon with a Maori man who had flown from New Zealand to see me, deciding to get rid of small talk and be brave, we took up looking for random relationship questions on the internet, putting ourselves in a state of vulnerability, passing the phone to and fro to one another, answering the questions (some risky) honestly or taking a shot. Needless to say our laughter turned the few heads in the bar with staff wondering what on earth we were doing… we were having FUN, face to face, laugh out loud honest fun.
I found I was sharing some things I hadn’t shared in my 11 year relationship, I was reflecting on things when thinking of my answers and through it getting to know each other more.
From an 11 year relationship to an afternoon in a London bar was the recipe to the creation of my card game ‘Truth or Shot.’
I took what I didn’t do in my past relationship and turned it in to a card game to help give other couples the chance to ask questions they perhaps haven’t dared ask and to relive moments within their relationship, creating fun, laughter and closer connections through playfulness.
It’s an idea (though one of many) I’ve actually taken a leap of faith with, putting it out to the world, it’s something I believe in, something I’m finding exciting (although scary at the same time) something I want to share with others and hopefully help build upon all the beautiful relationships out there.
Life has no dress rehearsal. Be adaptable, tenacious like all of us actors are, trust your own madness and take that risk.